Posts Tagged "don’t like"

Dismantling Problems

Dismantling Problems

Not all problems are problems, unless you are an imperfectionist. Then all problems are equal, and each one "has to" be fixed. When I woke up staring at the dead bugs in my ceiling lamp, I suddenly realized that despite all the growth I've had around perfectionism, at first glance, I was still seeing problems everywhere I looked! Little ones and big ones that all needed to be solved—dead...

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Removing Judgment—A Simple Exercise

Removing Judgment—A Simple Exercise

  This really happened: SAY WHAT YOU SEE (SWYS): “You are biting my shirt.”   (I didn’t like that.)   CAN DO: “That’s not OK with me. Must be something else you can bite. Hmm. Here, you can bite this!”   I offered the child the hem of his own shirt. He looked at me, grinned, then bit his own shirt. He walked around with his shirt in his mouth for a few minutes,...

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Hidden Cause of Your Reactions

Hidden Cause of Your Reactions

"You make me feel..." is not how it works. We are interrelated. Someone says something and you react, but the mechanism is misunderstood. There is a hidden middle step. We each have our own perceptions of the world, and though it seems that we react to what happens around us, our reactions actually come from our perceptions and interpretations instead.  For example, my grandmother hated...

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Boundary Trouble?

Boundary Trouble?

All boundaries are not equal. Here are three types: Natural boundaries:   "Fire is not for touching, because you will get burned."   "Poison ivy is not for picking, because your skin will blister and itch."   "Baby sister is not for shaking, because that will hurt her brain."   Social boundaries:   "Clothing is worn in public, because your body is private."   ...

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Wrong 2

This morning I realized that not only do I not like everything that is "wrong" as I said in the previous post, (of course, how could I?) but it goes the other way, too. Everything I don't like is just plain "wrong." Here's the equation for the collapsed concepts: not liking = wrong. Interesting how completely true this is for me. I've got to do a Breakfast with Sandy segment on this. [Look at...

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