Posts Tagged "boundaries"

Removing Judgment—A Simple Exercise

Removing Judgment—A Simple Exercise

  This really happened: SAY WHAT YOU SEE (SWYS): “You are biting my shirt.”   (I didn’t like that.)   CAN DO: “That’s not OK with me. Must be something else you can bite. Hmm. Here, you can bite this!”   I offered the child the hem of his own shirt. He looked at me, grinned, then bit his own shirt. He walked around with his shirt in his mouth for a few minutes,...

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3 Steps for Reconnecting with Your Mother

3 Steps for Reconnecting with Your Mother

Your relationship with your mother affects your entire life. If yours is challenging, now is the perfect time to transform it into one of love, respect and connection. When you do, it will transform your life. In a coaching conversation with a young woman about her highly reactive mother, I recommended three steps for transforming their relationship. She graciously gave her permission...

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Create Shopping Cooperation

Create Shopping Cooperation

What do you do when your child wants everything in the store? Instead of trying to reign in their wants, check your boundaries (physical, social or personal). It's OK to buy only what you can or want to buy, and validate the rest with wishes.  An odd thing happens with wishes. When you explore the details of children's wishes—what they love about it, what they might imagine they could...

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Why Setting Natural Consequences Is Hard

Why Setting Natural Consequences Is Hard

Children bickering and fighting can derail even the most mindful parent. Here's my advice to Marilyn (children 5, 4) for how to get back on track. QUESTION: I find setting natural consequences hard at times.   So my son and daughter each got these paper police cars that you create by folding. I made them each their own. Well, my son thought it was funny to crush my daughters police car. As a...

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From Criticism To Support

From Criticism To Support

"If you needed to lose weight, what would be most motivating?   You are getting chubby. I’m not buying you any more clothes until you lose weight.   Or:   Let’s take a walk after dinner. I’ll let you make the salad. I love you just the way you are, exactly as you are."   —Rachel Macy Stafford   That was how Rachel opened her viral blog post, "To Build (or Break) a...

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